Today my cats discovered the existence of zucchini. I was cooking tortellini to serve with steamed spinach and braised zucchini. While I was chopping zucchini, one particularly large zucchini rolled off the stack, rolled across the counter, landed on the floor and continued rolling across the kitchen until it came to a stop at the door seal between the kitchen and the living room.
I continued chopping, assuming I would just pick up the zucchini afterwards.
My black cat, Emmett comes strolling in, takes one look at the zucchini and goes full crazy black cat warpath mode, snarling, hissing, tail in full bottle brush, lunges on the zucchini, biting it, kicking it. Then stomps off.
Hearing the commotion, white cat Muumuu comes out, looks around, does not see the zucchini, yet, plops down on the trow rug by the doorway, bum inches from the zucchini and proceeds to wash her toes, snapping off toenails and spitting them across the room, in mid snap, toe in her mouth, she sees something out of the corner of her eye, freezes, rolls her eyes towards the zucchini, not moving, toe still in her mouth, them leaps into the air, hissing, howling, screaming, rolling, flipping, all her fur in full bottle brush mode, then slings back and punches the zucchini, it moves, she snarls and lashes out claws full threat and pumals the zucchini with lots of full claw punches.
Poe, the other black cat, hears the commotion and comes trotting out to see what's what. Does not immediately see the zucchini, walks up to MuuMuu curious, steps on the zucchini, oblivious to the existence of the zucchini, sniffs MuuMuu, casually looks down and sees that her paw is on a zucchini, leaps back hissing, back arched, tail bottle bristled and slinks circles around the zucchini.
Emmett comes back. Now there are 3 cats, 2 black and 1 white, slinking in arched back, hissing circles, like a cult doing some weird seance chant dance around a demon they had just summoned.
Koko, a cairn terrier pupppy, comes trotting in to find out what is this crazy shit his cats are up to now, goes to each cat and boops them them with his nose, then tip toes between them to nose boop the zucchini, jumps back scared, boops each of his 3 cats again, then boops the zucchini again, then deciding that it is a new chew toy, grabs it and gallops off triumphantly carrying away the zucchini, and leaving the 3 cats, to now sit and wash themselves as though nothing had ever happened.
Cats are weird.
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